Saturday, October 29, 2011


The scariest film of all time is Titanic.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Danger Zone

Raft3r is now - officially - a commuter.

This means the stress level is twice as high and the urge to hurt or (let alone) kill someone has almost become uncontrollable.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

I Don't Want To Live On The Moon

I don't like people who spit in public.

I don't like unruly drivers.

I don't like being told I'm fat.

I don't like bullies.

I don't like receiving mugs as Christmas gifts.

I don't like policemen.

I don't like donuts.

I don't like being tagged in Facebook.

But I do like girls who swallow.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Mr. Brightside

Raft3r has lost his cool.

Scenario 1

Mall of Asia. Shakey's.

Despite being right in front of her, the cashier continued to ignore me for more than 10 minutes.

Sensing my agitation she finally looked at me and said, "Sandali lang, ha. (You should wait.)"

Since she already had my credit card, I snapped it out of her hand and stormed out.

Scenario 2

Mall of Asia. Pizza Hut. Same day.

I ordered food to go.

Waitress took my plastic and asked me to take a seat at the waiting area near the exit.

Since there was an empty table next to her, I asked: "Can I wait here instead?"

Waitress: "That's only for paying customers."

Raft3r: "Bakit hindi ba ako magbabayad! (Am I not a paying customer!)"

I snatched my card from her and walked out.

Waitress ran after me to apologize. I completely ignored her.

Sorry, fellas. No more Mr. Nice Guy.

Monday, October 17, 2011

Politics Of Kissing

Tongue or no tongue?

Saturday, October 15, 2011

All That Glitters Isn't Gold

Filipinos' love affair with the overly dramatic is beyond me.

No wonder the latest Anne Curtis starrer is a goldmine at the box office.

Every imaginable cliche is present in this very predictable movie. To wit: catfight, car accident, male butt crack exposure, over the top confrontation with cheating husband, sex on the beach, witty repartee, marital advice from mom.

Like any other merchandise from the Lopez Empire, No Other Woman is nothing else but pure hype.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

You're The First, The Last, My Everything

My first crush was Cyndi Lauper.
My last crush was Nina Dobrev.

My first movie date was Beauty and the Beast.
My last movie date was Zombadings 1: Patayin sa Syokot si Remington.

My first CD was janet. by wifey.
My last CD purchase was If Not Now, When? by Incubus.

My first DVD was Risky Business.
My last DVD purchase was Supernatural Season 6.

My first Blu-ray was Alice in Wonderland.
My last Blu-ray purchase was Captain America.

My first gadget was the Sony Walkman.
My last gadget purchase was the MacBook Air.

My first concert was Cyndi Lauper.
My last concert attended was Incubus.

My first travel was in Chicago.
My last travel was in Macau.

My first sexual encounter was at age 12.
My last sexual encounter was - well, I'm not gonna incriminate myself.

The Deadbeat Club's first blog post was As I Am.
The Deadbeat Club's last post will be on January 19, 2013.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall

Why are relationships so full of drama? Why can't we just have fun? Why.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

I'll Be There For You

Last night's dream was incredible.

I was hanging out at Central Perk with Phoebe and Monica, two of my most favorite Friends' characters.

What made the dream more fun was that I was Joey!

The similarities between Joey and Raft3r are endless. For one, we are both brilliant actors.

How you doin'?

Saturday, October 1, 2011

The American

While wading through waist deep flood water brought about by Typhoon Pedring, the American next to me repeatedly kept saying, "Only in the Philippines. Only in the Philippines."

Mr. American, flooding is not entirely unique to the Philippines.

Consider the following:

So the next time you open your ignorant American piehole, get your facts straight.