Wednesday, August 5, 2020


Man, 2020 is a total bitch.

With Covid-19, we saw the entire world shut down before our very eyes.  The words quarantine, lockdown, virus, and anxiety became integral parts of the vocabulary for every breathing human being.

Travels were put on hold.  Work from home became the new normal.  Online shopping and food delivery became more vital to everyday life.  Masks, face shields, and PPEs instantly became fashion staples.  People were stuck at home, either alone, with loved ones or worst - with persons they actually abhor.

For Raft3r, it was 143 days of total bliss.  I wanted to be home.  I needed to be home.  I never wanted the lockdown to end, to be honest.

Here's a rundown of Raft3r's daily musing during his quarantine life.

Day 1: The wife wanted pancakes,  So I made her some.  Pwede na talaga akong mag-househusband, diba? (I can be a househusband, right?)
Day 2: Back to work.
Day 3: Wala ng pasok. (Work is cancelled.)
Day 4: I can totally get used to this.
Day 5: London painting finally up in our living room.
Day 6: Wine night.
Day 7: Man-cave is now up and running.
Day 8: It's food delivery time already.
Day 9: Linis banyo. (Time to clean the bathrooms.)
Day 10: Setting up for telework.
Day 11: Gotta stuck up on supplies.
Day 12: Updated work spreadsheets.
Day 13: Tubeeeeegggg! (Water service interruption.)
Day 14: I need butter.
Day 15: File travel insurance claims.
Day 16: Pay bills online.
Day 17: I don't even know what day it is now.  Totally lost track of time.
Day 18: The Hangover trilogy.
Day 19: Birds of Prey.
Day 20: Isang beses nalang sa buong araw mag-toothbrush at maghilamos. (I only wash my face and brush my teeth just once a day.)
Day 21: Real food.  Finally.  Beef lasagna, garlic parmesan chicken, baked salmon.
Day 22: Lost 2 pounds.
Day 23: Started roaming around the house with only my underwear on.
Day 24: Funko Pop inventory.
Day 25: We were supposed to fly to Milan today.
Day 26: Hot and humid.
Day 27: Good Friday.
Day 28: Today would have been my wife's first time in Paris.
Day 29: Happy Easter, boys and girls.
Day 30: Restaurant ready to cook meals to the rescue.
Day 31: 744 nonstop hours with the wife.
Day 32: Bought 2 Otter cases for an iPhone I don't even own yet.
Day 33: Kim's Convenience.
Day 34: Finally have time for my Lego sets.
Day 35: I finished reading a book.  It took me 34 days to read Warbringer.
Day 36: Anong araw na ba ngayon, ha? (What day is it already?)
Day 37: Online grocery shopping is stressful.
Day 38: We need a waffle maker.
Day 39: Finally got the sound bar to work.
Day 40: Our treadmill is here!
Day 41: I'm really comfortable not leaving our home.  I would make the perfect househusband.  I take pleasure in serving my wife.  My balls are still pretty much intact.
Day 42: Zoom with the JASMS kids.
Day 43: I need a deep fryer.  Our air fryer simply ain't cutting it for me.
Day 44: I miss playing Pokémon Go.
Day 45: Bacon.
Day 46: My sister's helper saw our pusakal eat a live bird.  (My sister's helper just saw our cat eat a live bird.)
Day 47: Heroes in Crisis.
Day 48: Our European vacation is supposed to come to an end today.
Day 49: File refund for the Alanis concert.
Day 50: Buntis na ba ako? (Am I pregnant?)
Day 51: Yun pinagdidiskitahan ni doktora ang mahaba kong buhok. (The good doctor wants to cut my hair.  I don't think so.)
Day 52: I miss Greenhills.
Day 53: Tumakbo ng shirtless sa treadmill na akala mo naman may abs. (Ran shirtless, as if I have a ripped body.)
Day 54: Tummy ache.
Day 55: Dilawan daw ako. (They think I'm anti-government.)
Day 56: I miss writing/blogging but I'm now married.  I can only be committed to a single entity.
Day 57: Still patiently waiting for Janet to cancel her tour.  So that I can live on with my life.
Day 58: There is a need for more seasons of Tiny House Nation on Netflix.
Day 59: Doctor Sleep.
Day 60: Finally bought an AVR for the treadmill.  Sana dumating agad para pwede na aircon habana tumatakbo.
Day 61: 44.
Day 62: Steak and potatoes.
Day 63: Today is Janet Jackson's birthday.
Day 64: Wala ng plantsa-plantsa ng mga nilabahan. (We no longer iron clothes.)
Day 65: Bluray and 4K inventory.
Day 66: I don't have the urge to go out of the house.  In fact, I don't wanna leave our home.  Everything and everyone I need and want are right here.  The outside world sucks.
Day 67: Taco Day.
Day 68: It's happening.  Zack Snyder's Justice League.  I almost cried.
Day 69: Started writing again.
Day 70: The Invisible Man.
Day 71: The whole house smells like bacon.  I love it.
Day 72: I really can't count.  I'm off by a day.  Day 44 is a double entry.  (FYI.  Fixed this for the blog post.)
Day 73: Cooked lunch for the good doctor.  Breaded pork chop on a bed of multigrain rice with crab and corn soup.
Day 74: The good doctor's going out today for her project launch.  Everybody, please wish her good luck.
Day 75: Strength conditioning in the morning.  Cardio exercise in the afternoon.  Sadly, all these will change when I return to work.
Day 76: This is the only time I got sad.  We are no longer in lockdown.
Day 77: Somebody Feed Phil.
Day 78: Lechon. (Roasted pig.)
Day 79: I already have five strands of grey hair.
Day 80: Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.  Where the secondary characters are way more funny and interesting than the lead.
Day 81: Hello, outside world.  Please be kind.  I'm a little scared to be quite honest.
Day 82: Double time at the treadmill today.
Day 83: Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
Day 84: Santa Clarita Diet. Drew Barrymore as a TV star.  Just one of her many reincarnations.
Day 85: Some of The Witcher's CGU are cringeworthy.
Day 86: A virus singlehandedly killed 2020.
Day 87: Spanish bread.
Day 88: Money Heist Funko Pops.
Day 89: Woke up to pretty disturbing news.  Our office is now on Phase 1.
Day 90: Ulam sa tanghali.  Ulam padin sa hapunan. (Leftover lunch is dinner food.)
Day 91: It's my sister's birthday.
Day 92: Lasagna.
Day 93: So our actual home gym is a mess.  It looks like a storeroom.  Found some old photos.  Man, I look good!
Day 94: After 10 million years, I finished reading Crisis On Infinite Earths.
Day 95: Filed for refund with Cathay Pacific on March 1.  They said that it'll take 90 days to process. Today is June 17.  Refund is still pending.
Day 96: Haven't seen my nieces since March.  I miss hugging them.
Day 97: Animal Kingdom.
Day 98: Crabs.  Pork.  Noodles.
Day 99: Infinite Crisis.
Day 100: Last night I got to see my nieces with masks on and proper social distancing.  It was bittersweet.  I wanted to hug and kiss them but I can't.  Broke my heart a bit.
Day 101: More cancelled trips coming right up.
Day 102: Popeye's Chicken
Day 103: My wife is working even harder during the lockdown.  She deserves a break.
Day 104: Ayan. Hindi na 12K kuryente namin ni doktora.  9K nalang.  (Our electric bill dropped from 12K to 9K.)
Day 105: Designated Survivor.  Yup, I'm late in the game.
Day 106: Mukhang August na ako papasok sa opis nito, ah.  (I'm going back to the office in August.)
Day 107: The hunt for the perfect washing machine.
Day 108: I accidentally cut myself.  Ouch.
Day 109: Papayat uli ako.  (I will soon lose weight again.)
Day 110: You know the World Wide Web is big enough for all of us to share.  So instead of spreading hate, why don't we all just get along?  Try and learn to respect each other's views, shall we?
Day 111: Craving for tapsilog.
Day 112: Pancit palabok or panic canton?  The ultimate noodle challenge.
Day 113: We bought a new toy.  Hopefully, the water that comes out of this purifier doesn't taste like mud. 
Day 114: Mall of Asia is swarming with people. 
Day 115: Got an email from Lyft confirming my refund for a cab ride I allegedly took in June.  I haven't been to the US since August last year.
Day 116: Time to pay more bills.  Adulting is fun.
Day 117: The wife and I watched Last Christmas.  She has no clue who George Michael was.  She does not know what this holiday song is all about.  Boy, was she totally blown away on how the movie turned out.  Love being married to a millennial.
Day 118: The only thing I hate about the AirPods Pro is that it won't work on older iPod models.  Yes, I still have an iPod I use while at the gym.  Do you have a problem with that?
Day 119: Japanese horror movies are on sale.  Thank you, iTunes.
Day 120: I actually miss going to church.
Day 121: Woke up extra early today to make her some pancakes.
Day 122: Crispy pata + kare-kare = perfect food combo
Day 123: Invest.  It's the perfect way to reward your self.
Day 124: Do you honestly think that you look good in your selfies?
Day 125: After more than 4 months, Cathay Pacific came through with our refund.
Day 126: Bacon and eggs for breakfast.
Day 127: After 5 years on being on my shopping cart, finally purchased that big DC Lego set.
Day 128: Checked my work email and found out that I have an award waiting for me at the office.
Day 129: Does a cat know if he's banging his own mother?
Day 130: Patiently waiting for my Lazada deliveries.
Day 131: The only marital challenge we have during this pandemic is choosing where to order food.
Day 132: I want a burger.
Day 133: Is porn art? It is, right?
Day 134: Hello, BGC.  Don't be scary please.
Day 135: It's a non-working holiday this Friday.  Wait.  I haven't worked in 4 months.
Day 136: RTB investment.
Day 137: My 13 year old niece reads Pulitzer winning books.  At that age, I could barely finish a Hardy Boys novel.
Day 138: Purple Oven.
Day 139: I was supposed to go to a Janet Jackson concert next month.
Day 140: I am not mentally ready to report for work yet.
Day 141: I lost 14 pounds since the lockdown.
Day 142: Going back to work in 2 days.  I wonder how our office will respond to the new government announcement.
Day 143: Microsoft Teams meeting.
Day 144: Hello, Roxas Boulevard.  I'm back.

Sunday, January 19, 2020

Tweak Your Nipple

One night in bed, my lovely wife blurted out, “Pinkish pala nipples mo, ano?! (You have pink nipples.)”

Shit.  You simply can’t make this stuff up.

Post script: Today we celebrate the 12th year of The Deadbeat Club.