Sunday, December 28, 2008

Home For The Holidays

The Holiday Season is the perfect time for reunions and get-togethers.

Raft3r must have gone to a million parties this month. But nothing beats having dinner with old friends.

I haven’t seen my grade school buddies in ages. So when they facebooked (Yes, it’s a verb now.) about meeting for dinner, I immediately said yes.

So there we were at Cyma’s. Raft3r was surrounded by familiar faces and loving it. These are the people I practically grew up with.

Over dinner, Raft3r was teased for being the only 5th grader to wear shorts in class. After downing a bottle of red wine, more roasting ensued.

They also recalled this incident where I brought a hot chick to a friend’s office. My friends kept asking what her name was. Raft3r couldn’t even remember.

Going down to memory lane is always fun and sometimes embarrassing.

All I can say is: “Thank God for growth.”

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Eat For Two

Raft3r’s favorite food is lechon (suckling pig).

You can tell how grand a feast is when lechon is served.

Its crispy skin is the most delectable part of the lechon. Man, I’m salivating just blogging about it.

On Christmas Eve, Raft3r was at the airport to pick up our lechon from Tacloban.

Although lechon Tacloban is far less popular than lechon Cebu, the former tastes way better than the latter. Raft3r should know. After all, I am the lechon connoisseur. I have been eating it all my life.

While waiting for our lechon to clear security, one of the airport guards commented: “Sir, mas madami pang lechon ngayon sa eroplano kesa sa tao.” (“Sir, there are more roasted pigs on board the plane than there are human passengers.”)

Enough said.

Post script: There goes Raft3r's wish to lose weight.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Grown-Up Christmas List

1. For gas prices to continuously drop.
2. A new Jodie Foster movie.
3. No more stupid billing statements from Globe.
4. Higher salary increase. (Uncle Sam, 2% is simply not cutting it!)
5. A return trip to New York.
6. No to charter change. (GMA, give it a rest.)
7. Lose 20 pounds.

What’s yours?

Merry Christmas to all the wonderful readers of The Deadbeat Club!!!

Post script: Raft3r also wants world peace. But so does every beauty pageant contestant.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

Despite being feverish and all, Raft3r headed to the mall to begin his Christmas shopping.

Better late than never, right?

Armed with a very limited budget, I searched for various toys for my godchildren. Yes, even Raft3r is affected by this global economic crisis crap.

Anyone wants to buy my iPhone?

For this shopping trip, I wore a hoodie and very dark sunglasses. After all, Raft3r was sick. I did not want to be recognized.

As I passed by two chicks, I overheard their conversation.

Girl 1: “Artista ba yan?” (“Is he a celebrity?”)

Girl 2: “Hindi. Feeling lang!” (“Nah. In his dreams!”)

Raft3r couldn’t help but laugh.

Friday, December 19, 2008

Unsent/The Love Letter

Dear Ex #1,

They say one never forgets their first time. I can attest to that.
Our two week relationship was a testament on how commitment phobic I can get.

Dear Ex #2,

It was nice meeting you.

But breaking up with you was even better. Having a female stalker was a huge ego booster.

Dear Ex #3,

You were my soul mate. You accepted all my flaws. You were always there for me.

That freaked me out.

Dear Ex #4,

To this day, no one can top what you gave me for my birthday.

I apologize for dumping you right after that.

Dear Ex #5,

I felt like a dirty old man when I was dating you. I was in college. You were in high school.

Asking me to help you out with your homework was the last straw.

Dear Ex #6,

Our relationship was like a roller coaster. And everyone came along for the ride.

Dear Ex #7,

For once in my life, I can say I dated a model.

I can also claim I once went out with a bulimic.

Dear Ex #8,

We almost got hitched. You were the first girl I ever said “I love you” to.

I was smitten.

Thank God I finally came to my senses.

Dear Ex #9,

You were probably the nicest girl I have ever met.

You do not deserve me. I am sorry.

Dear Ex #10,

We always had fun. That was the trouble.

Dear Ex #11,

I never really loved you anyway.

Dear Ex #12,

Don’t worry.

I don’t kiss and tell.

Post script: Now who can say men have such lousy memory?

Monday, December 15, 2008


Raft3r always enjoys a good cat fight.

It’s always such a turn on to see women get on each others' nerves. Girl mud wrestling is also hot.

Like most men, Raft3r is not a big fan of showbiz gossip.

But when I heard this rumor that Marian Rivera is pregnant and Karylle made this mischievous smile when asked to comment about it, I couldn’t help but get hooked.

An office mate was my first informant. When I got home, I immediately tuned in to the news and there it was.

Marian Rivera pouring buckets of tears and crying foul over Karylle’s malicious smile after being asked about the alleged pregnancy.

Raft3r is not taking sides.

But from the look of things, Karylle is at fault. Instead of giving a diplomatic answer (like she did in previous interviews), she gave this grin that is subject to different malicious interpretations.

Brokenhearted and all, she may still feel some bitterness. This may somewhat explain her behavior.

I heard people say that Karylle took the high road during the whole break up controversy. So why the sudden change?

Of course, you can’t blame Karylle if she wants to remain controversial. Everyone is entitled to their 15 minutes of fame.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Leaving Las Vegas

A couple of months back, Raft3r spent a week in Vegas.

That trip was awesome!
Everything about the Sin City is over the top. To say that Las Vegas gives utmost important to extravagance is an understatement.
Even their airport has slot machines. How cool is that.
The Strip is a visual feast. 
Raft3r walked around and was fascinated with everything in sight. I also felt underdressed. I was in shorts and flip flops. Everyone around me was absolutely gorgeous and dressed to kill.
My cousins and I had dinner at the Bellagio. Raft3r ate like there was no tomorrow.
I felt like a Hedonist during that visit. There was just too much of everything in Vegas.
The college frat boy who was with Raft3r on the same flight summed it at best: “Let’s party, dude!”

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Things That Make You Go Hmmmm....

Someone or something has been messing with Raft3r for the past weeks or so.

Remember the black cat incident?

To this day, Raft3r has continuously been losing things left and right.

Recent victims were a couple of CDs, my Calvin Klein jeans, and pilfered hotel goodies from Tagaytay.

Where have they gone? Who took them? These questions will probably remain unanswered.

Just like the Bermuda Triangle and other unsolved mysteries, the case of the missing Raft3r items will always be a puzzle.

I really have no idea what’s going on. Maybe I should try exorcism.

For crying out aloud, Raft3r is an obsessive compulsive. This shouldn’t even be happening.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Think Like A Girl

What kind of satisfaction does a chick get for being irrational?

Raft3r recently received a text message from an estranged lover.

We dated a couple of years back. It was nothing serious. That’s how I treated what we had. That’s also the reason why she hates me until now.

My ex proudly proclaimed she is now preggers.

I didn’t know how to reply to such news. So I decided to disregard it.

Apparently, she really wanted me to know about her present condition. Hence, I got another text message from her.

Raft3r ignored her completely.

Why would I care? It’s not as if she’s carrying my child.

After all these years, she still assumes that I am interested with what goes on in her life. I didn’t even give a damn at the time we were together. What makes her think I would be now?

Raft3r does not, in any way, mean to be disrespectful. But she is definitely barking up the wrong tree.

Thursday, December 4, 2008


Being a newbie at work, Raft3r has a lot on his plate.

If they ask you to do something, you oblige. No questions asked.

If they tell to jump, you say how high.

So when a company sponsored bowling tournament was announced, guess who participated wholeheartedly?

Yes, Raft3r volunteered to play.

Pakikisama (camaraderie) is still a highly regarded Filipino trait in the workplace. Peer pressure is one big fat bitch.

I haven’t bowled since high school. This became very evident during the tournament. Raft3r was immediately tagged as the good looking kid who couldn’t bowl.

Redemption came when after three games, I finally found my rhythm. Strikes and spares were my new best friends.

Bowling is the only sport I know where one can drink beer while playing. And we still wonder why it is just an exhibition game in the Olympics?