Thursday, January 19, 2012

I Am Number Four

The Deadbeat Club is now on its fourth year!

The following are just some of the memorable lines in the past 365 days:

I really just don't care.

My Sony Bravia is such a thing of beauty I could practically marry the bitch.
How dumb am I that I can be duped by my own flesh and blood?

McDonald's tastes good anywhere in the world.

A beautiful and expensive wedding does not make a happy marriage last
forever.

T-Bag has nothing on Lots-O'-Huggin' Bear.

For a change, I did something good for myself.

As God as my witness, I will never fly budget again.

Love is spelled J-a-n-e-t.

Nothing like a bevy of beauties with dark underarms to ruin an otherwise
perfect vacation in paradise.

Cursing is a good stress reliever.

Don't take me too seriously. I don't.

Though walking is a good form of exercise, it also works out one's appetite.

The one thing I detest most in the world is a coward.

Smile. Life is awesome.

Why are most dogs cuter than their human owners?

Only in Mali Bay will you find unscrupulous people who would be interested in a half breed and sell it for a profit.

Whenever I run into a 70 year old man holding hands and being affectionate with a 20 year old chick, I see love.

I believe a lot of people are suckers for love.

I just don't have the heart to summon someone to take my order and bring me my drink when the waiter is way shorter than my 7 year old niece.

Raft3r's two favorite words: "Malapit nako. (I'm coming.)"

I live a very sad life these days.

Am I really that butt ugly in person?
(Right Track Wrong Train)

Not every Filipino likes Charice.
(Learning The Hard Way)

For more than two years, I have gone commando.
(Revelations)

But can there be love without sex?
(Sex And Candy)

Kung gigising ako ng ganon kaaga, dapat ako ang bayaran nila.
(Run This Town)

I don't care much for most humans. But I love all dogs.
(All Dogs Go To Heaven)

You are delusional if you think you can change me.

A 35 year old man being accompanied by his mother to a doctor's appointment is just plain embarrassing.

Besides, death extinguishes debt.

Now that you found an scapegoat in everyone's favorite bitch, may we know what your next move is?

A man in red underwear is a sight for sore eyes.

Happiness does not normally equate to righteousness.
(If It Makes You Happy)

Watching a 60 year old lady eat a hotdog on a stick and seeing her lick it is just plain disgusting.

How do you politely tell the proud parents that their child looks like a monkey?

I miss smashing your face.

Can I just ask out your officemate on a date to lessen her worries?

When a man, who you hardly know and is not even your friend, sends you text messages about his whereabouts and even tells you that he is on his way home, what does that mean?

Mistakes are there for a reason. But I don't think they are made so you can become the butt of all jokes.

Instead of idolizing panty-less celebrities, cocaine sniffing socialites, and an ungrateful starlet, our youth should emulate Janela Lelis of Malinao, Albay.

You don't need a partner to be complete.

How does it feel to have someone who you can't live without?

My childhood musical hero was Milli Vanilli.

I will never run after an ex.

When does love turn into an obligation?

The scariest film of all time is Titanic.

Raft3r is now - officially - a commuter. This means the stress level is twice as high and the urge to hurt or (let alone) kill someone has almost become uncontrollable.

I don't like being tagged in Facebook.

Bakit hindi ba ako magbabayad! (Am I not a paying customer!)

Tongue or no tongue?

Like any other merchandise from the Lopez Empire, No Other Woman is nothing else but pure hype.

Why are relationships so full of drama? Why can't we just have fun?

So the next time you open your ignorant American piehole, get your facts straight.

No one disrespects Raft3r and gets away with it.

I dunno anyone who goes to a buffet just for the salad.

Gloria's present predicament - by far - has more twists and turns than your usual telenovela.

Man hating won't get you anywhere.

I will be a better man for you.

Raft3r has been 80% nice and only 20% naughty this year.

Unlike most of Raft3r's dates, Siri always delivers and never disappoints.

If she ever decides to do porn, now that is classy.

I am the guy who will marry for all the wrong reasons.

In a split second, relationships can turn tragic. That is why I choose to remain single.

Time is a bitch. You can never have it back.

Indeed, recession has finally hit home.

If Unkabogable Praybeyt Benjamin (so they say) is the highest grossing local film of all time, what does that say about the Filipino movie-going audience?

Don't recycle. Never date the same person twice.
(Single Me Out)

Post script: Click here for last year's quotes.

50 comments:

gillboard said...

ikaw na ang may winning lines. :P

Raft3r said...

gillboard, Wala kang comment sa previous post! Hmp! Hehe

Anonymous said...

hapi bday!

Raft3r said...

anonymous, Salamat!

gillboard said...

ayan, nagcomment na ako ulit dun.

happy 4th!!!

Raft3r said...

gillboard, Nyahaha. Idol talaga kita! Salamat!

caye said...

wagi talaga ang tongue or no tongue lol

Raft3r said...

caye, Nyahaha. Salamat. Ano nga pala sagot mo sa tanong na yan, ha? Hehe

Anonymous said...

WOW! HAPPY!
Just keep on blogging noh!!
-charlie mama

Raft3r said...

charlie mama, I will blog until next year! Hehe

EMO_RUNNER said...

happppppy birthdayyyyyyy!!!! ^_^

Raft3r said...

emo_runner, Teeeeeeeeeeeenk yooooooooooooooou!

Anonymous said...

happy birthday sa malibay

Raft3r said...

anonymous, Salamat!

pete said...

nakaapat kana pala

Raft3r said...

pete, Awful 4! Hehe

brando said...

4 na taon ka na palang nanggogoyo

Raft3r said...

bradon, Correction. 24 years na akong nanggogoyo. Nyahaha

elsa said...

tagal mo na pala blog

Raft3r said...

elsa, Oo. Kaw, eh. Recently ka lang nagsimula nagbasa dito. Hehe

Liz said...

Happy anniversary! Parang kelan lang no. :)

Raft3r said...

liz, Pati sa blogging tumatanda nako! Nyahaha

Jayr said...

Birthday ba ito o anniversary?

Raft3r said...

jayr, Ewan ko nga ba. Hehe. Both?

Anonymous said...

Congratulations!

Raft3r said...

anonymous, Ha? Did I win anything? Hehe. Salamat!

pete said...

kita kits mamaya

Raft3r said...

pete, Ha? Kasama ka pala! Hehe

hoshi sr said...

Happy Anniversary Kuya Raft3r!

i'm glad na feeling ko part ako ng 4 na taon ng blog mo. hehehe


mabuhay kita kita sa 2013, sa kasal mo. hahaha

Raft3r said...

hoshi sr, Big part ka. Syempre. Pati si Chief! Sya, sya. Kita kits next year! Hehe

atticus said...

congratulations! four years. mas may commitment ka sa blog mo kaysa sa sinumang girl you went out with. hahaha!

Raft3r said...

atticus, Aray! Nyahaha

Wendy said...

Happy 4th blog anniv! Dapat may contest ka. Ang premyo ay walking tour sa Malibay plus a free meal sa sm moa after the tour. Hahaha

Raft3r said...

wendy, Nyahaha. Sobrang creative mo talaga! Hehe

ahmer said...

wow happy chinese new year! haha

Raft3r said...

ahmer, Nyahaha. Bukas pa yon. Sayo din! Hehe

Anita said...

How was the concert? Congrats sa blog mo.

Raft3r said...

Salamat sa bati. Katy was awesome pero super late. Hehe

jejemom said...

hbd sa dbc!

Raft3r said...

jejemom, Nahirapan pa ako isipin ang ibig sabihin ng comment mo. Hehe. Eugene? Nyahaha

saM said...

maligayang pagtanda. more please.

Raft3r said...

sam, Until January 2013 pa naman. Kaya more pa din yon. Hehe. Thanks, Sam!

yummy friend said...

bakit nga ako kelangang mag-comment dito?

Raft3r said...

yummy friend, Hay naku. Dapat kahapon. Hindi ngayon. Tsk, tsk

len said...

Late greetings, I know but happy anniversary sa Mali Bay!

Blog-hopping gives me a certain kind of joy so keep on writing! :) Kahit one-liner lang ang post mo. :)))

Raft3r said...

len, Hehe. You have until next year para ma-enjoy kunwari ang The Deadbeat Club.

eden said...

Wow, congratulations, 4 yrs na pala! Keep blogging..:)

Raft3r said...

eden, Oo. 4 years na. Time to retire. Hehe

Anonymous said...

Why quit blogging?

Denoy Eusebio said...

anonymous, Nakaka-stress din kasi mag-isip na ibla-blog. Hehe