It Takes Two

The Mali Bay boy’s Deadbeat Club turns another year older today. Yehey!

Just like the previous year, Raft3r presents the quotable quotes of 2009:

There is nothing scarier than answering questions from a priest. (New Beginning)

Ages 5 and 3 spell F-U-N! (Flightplan)

Raft3r’s childhood heroes were Oscar the Grouch, Reggie Mantle, Veronica Lodge, and Donald Duck. Now you know where I got my mean streak. (When I Grow Up)

Girl on girl action is hot. (The Brave One)

My brain simply refuses to exercise. (Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want)

Raft3r doesn’t cry over heartbreaks. (The Truth About Cats And Dogs)

But the best part of sleeping is waking up, especially if you wake up next to someone you actually like. (Sleep All Day)

After all, I was once a fool in love. (Someone To Watch Over Me)

I know. You don’t have to tell me. I’m a coward. (Greatest X)

There is something sexy about women in winter clothes. (Hole In My Heart [All The Way To China])

Be your own best friend. It’s the greatest thing you can do for yourself. (What’s Simple Is True)

I have been constantly losing friends to immigration. (Fly Away)

Four days of fun and partying also mean four days of work piled at your desk while you’re gone. (Karma)

While they write their legal drafts, Raft3r does his blog posts. Guess who’s the lucky one? (Beginning is The End Is The Beginning)

Mr. Tsao, kindly place your photo right beside Raft3r’s. Tell me. Who looks like a servant now? (Man In The Mirror)

I will always be horny. (You Learn)

My cousins would often tease me that I would burn in hell for being different. I told them it didn’t matter. I had air conditioning. (40 Days And 40 Nights)

That doesn’t make me a good person. That only means I’m a pushover. (Breakaway)

Yes, I am not afraid to admit I act like a high school chick every time I see a frog. (The Sum Of All Fears)

I have no interest whatsoever in the private affairs of others. I got my own life to live. (Are You In?)

If a girl can make me wait for at least two hours in order for her to get ready for our date and I won’t get pissed, that is a pretty good indication our relationship can last for a minimum of six months and subject to renewal. (Waiting In Vain)

It only takes a video to make one famous. How else can you explain Paris Hilton? (Video Killed The Radio Star)

It is one of the best feelings ever – almost close to an orgasm. (Pay It Forward)

Thirty years later, my idea of roughing it is getting stuck in a hotel room with no cable TV. (I Know What You Did Last Summer)

It is tough to get serious when everyone around you is an idiot. (Destination Nowhere)

It was just like Waterworld without Kevin Costner’s terrible thespian skills. (The Day The Earth Stood Still)

Spending time with my family is like watching a really terrible movie. You know it’s bad for you. But you still stay glued, just to see how it all ends. (Whoops Now)

We should be kind, even to Satan’s helpers. (Slap A Bitch)

Is Raft3r a baby maker or a manwhore? (Touch My Body)

Post script: For 2008 quotes, click here.